why does christmas make me want to cry

// Who do you turn to//

For years I have had a constant sadness, numbness, suppressed under my effervescent personality. I have troubles that I need to talk to someone about, but anyone who i would consider as confiding in I refrain. Those people, my closest friends have issues way beyond my mediocre problems. Although i do not understand my heart and emotions myself, there are still things that needs to be addressed but I can’t put it in to words. I have been shut down in the past, when I have tried to express my woes, which may have contributed to my silence. Now I just sit her, confused as what to do.